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My kids are addicted to cell phone. What now?

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Cell phone and technology use in general by kids has been attacked by the media, schools, doctors and family. Technology can be an ally if used responsibly and with guidance from the parents, but it is common to find kids who are already addicted to screens. 

But if my kid is already addicted, what should I do? 

First, we need to understand what happens when a child is using the cell phone completely out of place and proportion. Technology use becomes a problem when: 

If you have identified some of these items on your children’s behavior, it is possible that technology is being used excessively in your house. 

What to do when children use the phone too much?

Before taking action, watch how you spend your free time at home and the frequency with which you use the phone, tablet or television. Children copy their parents’ behavior and, if parents also use technology excessively in front of them, it is more difficult for children to change their behavior with respect to screens. If you work using your phone, it is worth explaining that it is part of your job. 

Time spent together with family is key to children’s lives, and putting the phone away during these moments is important. Helping children overcome excessive phone use is to also look at your own habits and reconsider how you use it. 

:: Also read: Loot Boxes: are we getting our children addicted to gambling without noticing? ::

Having done that, talk to your children about phone use regardless of their age. Explain the reasons why excess technology isn’t healthy. But remember that warning them isn’t about causing panic or shame. 

Establish a time limit along with your child. Involving children in this type of decision makes the limit seem less unfair to them, in addition to them also consenting to the using time. 

Enjoy your and your children’s free time together. Instead of being on the phone, play board games, make up a game of your own, teach them how to cook, make dinner together. Take advantage of this time to strengthen your family bond. 

It is worth noting that participating in phone, tablet or TV activities within the children’s stipulated time is healthy: the bond is also formed and, at the same time that you become closer and you manage to get a sense of what they are consuming on the phone, the children also see that you are interested in their world.  

Another piece of advice that may help when the time to put the phone away comes is a physical stopwatch on which you and your children can set the agreed-upon time together when they are about to use the phone or tablet or watch television. The stopwatch can have a theme or even be customized by the children. 

Having an “offline basket”, where everyone in the house, including the adults, leaves the phone when they are not using it is also a good idea. Mealtimes are the perfect moment for the basket to be full, for example. 

A helpful suggestion is not to treat the phone as a bargaining chip or as a prize/punishment resource. Placing devices in such a way on children’s lives can make them do schoolwork not because they have to, but in order to earn more time on the phone. 

When it comes to punishment, it is unfair to take away an agreed-upon “right” due to misbehavior, specially when such behavior is unrelated to the phone, television or tablet. Using phones to award or punish may cause deep insecurity and ensuing anxiety in children, since there isn’t a clear rule as to when they will earn or lose the right to use them. 

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